This is one of those “sexy” new trader joe’s creamer I was talking about last week when I promised I’d review something more interesting than common pantry fare soon-ish. Trader Joe’s Super Seedy Cheese Snack Bites are definitely new, but are they really that sexy?

Welp, I’m gonna go out on a limb and sayno. But let’s look at both sides of this equation. There are some things working here. Let’s try to be positive and look at that stuff first. These are indeed parmesan-laden and cheesy and that’s the “CHEESE” part of the product title.

In my humble opinion the cheesiness is good and the intensity is about right. These things are crispy and crunchy in a very unique way. I tried to capture the texture visually with the new macro feature on my phone camera. You can see all the rifts, ridges, nooks, crannies, and seediness up close. Of course, that photo is larger than life. I meandepending upon the size of your monitor screen. Maybe if you’re on mobile right now, it’s just about life size.

But then I don’t know how big your phone is. Maybe I should just tell you how big they are. Fortunately, there’s a ruler right behind me as I write this. Like maybe two or three small bites a piece for me. So let’s move on to what’s not working: nearly everything else. The overall taste of these is like black pepper. It’s a pungent, acrid, bitter pepper punch in each and every bite.

Actually some bites are worse than others. It builds up on the tongue and honestly I can only eat one or two crisps at a time. They’re very light, too, in terms of density. DR – Crunchy parmesan aspects are nice. Whole Peppercorns two out of five stars.